A Tribute to the Sisterhood

3 days ago, I said good-bye to my last apartment of girls-my sisters. 8 months ago, I started my journey as a resident assistant, a big sister to 59 young ladies. It was overwhelming at first but mostly because I was transitioning while they were transitioning. They were finding the balance of going from dependence to independence, and I was going from a complete focus of others to balancing myself and others. But as I described in my first letter to them, "I’m ready to make this a year full of NO REGRETS. No regrets making life-long friends, working hard, living with integrity, strengthening faith, and finding fun!" And that's what happened. I made life-long friends who will always have my back, worked hard in school and at home, lived honestly, boosted my faith, and found a ton of fun with these wonderful ladies! I lived the past 8 months with no regrets. Not that I didn't make mistakes. I will always make mistakes, but what I learned while and after I made those mistakes, I will always remember with no regrets. Between both semesters, I gained 66 little sisters. As I was taking decorations down on my bulletin board, the words NO REGRETS were still imprinted. I thought of the imprints these women have made in my life. This is a list, one from each girl, something I learned/relearned from them. (No it's not in any order, so don't try to guess. Plus many of these girls share many of these qualities, but I thought of one specifically for each beautiful lady.)

1. Dance your troubles away.

2. Always call someone's name when you see them and give them the best hugs, you never know when that person needs it.

3. "Cast not away therefore your confidence." (Hebrews 10:35)

4. Trust that people don't really mean to do you wrong.

5. Seeing everyone with kindness will always show the beauty within them and yourself.

6. Always have a laugh ready.

7. Work hard even when life is going against you.

8. Never endure the first breakup alone. It's easier to cry while crying on someone's shoulder.

9. Life could always be worse, but we just have to brush off the bad and embrace the good.

10. Have faith that people can be healed through the Atonement.

11. Life really stinks sometimes, but you have to keep your chin up and push through.

12. One person can make a difference in an apartment.

13. Every person is needed. 14. Don't just say that you love someone, show it. 15. Say what you mean. 16. Have faith that a new start will outweigh the past. 17. Be a friend to all. 18. Delegation is a good thing. 19. Everyone has a deep perspective in the gospel somehow. 20. Talking in accents can brighten anyone's day. 21. Helping someone even a little may make a huge difference to them. 22. Life's easier when you are on top of everything. 23. Even when God gives you something you don't like, learn to love it. 24. Love everyone and everything with all your heart. 25. Have the best of friends, because they will always have your back.  26. Always look your best. You never know when you'll meet a cute boy. ;)

27. Take risks because you never know what success you'll gain.

28. Just because someone doesn't show emotion doesn't mean that they don't care.

29. Have an open door-figuratively and literally-you never know who will walk in your life.

30. Anyone can be a missionary at anytime.

31. If you want something, do everything you can to get it.

32. Laugh at your mistakes, but then figure out how to not do it again.

33. The smallest bodies can have some of the biggest hearts.

34. The smallest compliment can make someone's day/week/semester.

35. Even when someone has an opposite view, you don't have to take a defense. Embrace the differences.

36. If you're going to dance, dance like there's no tomorrow! 37. Smile-always. 38. Make time for fun. 39. Keep life exciting. 40. If someone is in need, find a way to help. 41. Don't let anyone make a decision for you. Make all your decisions between yourself and God. No one else should interfere. 42. If at first you don't succeed, try try again. 43. When the bad comes, just chillax, it will pass over. 44. It's easier to tell the truth first than deal with the lie later. 45. Always say what needs to be said even when it will be hard and you don't know the outcome. 46. See everyone with an eye of faith. 47. A cool head is better than being a hot head. 48. Even if you don't get along at first, there's always something in common. 49. Say yes when it's possible, then figure out how to make it work. 50. Keep showing love even if someone doesn't show that love in return. It makes a difference. 51. Never lose a moment with people because you never know when you won't have moments with them again. 52. Sometimes in an argument, someone is not wrong but both are just misunderstood. 53. Sing with all your heart and with no shame.

54. A big smile can go a long way for yourself and others.

55. Life is meant to enjoy, so enjoy every moment!

56. Find out how you get energy because you never know when you need it.

57. Stress is sometimes good because it keeps you moving.

58. Be excited for life.

59. Be yourself. People will love you for who you are.

60. Love life and show it to the world!

61. Music can have a powerful effect on the soul.

62. It's okay to cry.

63. Always have a positive attitude even if those around you don't.

64. Whatever trials you have to go through, fight through it. Don't let it succumb you.

65. Dream big because you never know when the opportunity will come to fulfill them.

66. Once a big sister, always a big sister.


These ladies helped me become the best I could be and helped me live this past school year with no regrets. "No Regrets" has been my life motto since I made the biggest regret of my life in high school. I chose this as the theme for my floor as an RA because I wanted my girls to live their freshman year with no regrets. I hope they did or at least learned from the mistakes they made. Because as shown above, I have learned soo much from them. I love these amazing young women. After they had all gone and checked-out of their rooms, I walked through the rooms, and I could still see them sitting on their beds or couches or standing in the kitchen or laughing on the floor. :) I still saw their beautiful faces. I will never forget them. I hope they at least invite me to their mission farewells/homecomings and/or wedding receptions. I want to be there if I can! After all, they are my sisters. :) 

Ladies, if you're reading this, remember you are beautiful (believe me, I've seen you at all different times and you ALWAYS amaze me with your beauty) and remember that I love you, but more importantly remember you have a loving Heavenly Father and brother, Jesus Christ who are always there for you even if us mere mortals can't be there for you. Keep going! Keep dreaming! Keep believing! Keep smiling! I'll miss you. I already do. I love you.

What a Girl Wants, What a Girl Needs

I don't ever announce this through social media, but it brought out some interesting thoughts which I think needs to be said. Last night, I got asked out on a date. Now before your thoughts go and run wild, I want to put down some background. I hope my date doesn't mind me saying, but I'm sure he would agree that this date is definitely a friend date. There are no romantic desires involved. We're just friends (1. He's about 4 years younger than me, 2. He's a good 6 inches shorter than me). But even with all those things in mind, I'm really excited to go. Last night, I told many friends I saw and just couldn't stop thinking about it. At one point, I thought, "Why am I so excited? What makes this different than if he just asked to hang out?" As I thought more about it, the answer came that girls like to be asked on dates. It brings all these flurries of emotions. Girls like to get all 'purtied up', tell their friends and family the before and after details, and simply to know someone pays attention to them. A date is a huge compliment to a girl. Now this is not a plea for all men to get on the ball to ask girls on dates because I know you get enough pressure from others (if not from yourself). This post is not about the "d" word in that sentence (date), but the "c" word: compliment.

A compliment goes a long way. As stated in this last conference from our beloved prophet, Thomas S. Monson, "You may forget words you express today, but the recipient will remember them for a lifetime." I am one of those recipients who many have given thoughtful, kind compliments. I'm so grateful for those people who have told me those wonderful nice words. One experience I will definitely not forget in this lifetime or the next. I think this will come as a shock to some of you (which it shouldn't many girls go through this), but as a young girl, I didn't think myself as pretty. I was 5 foot in 3rd grade, so I always felt like the giant. I had crooked teeth which I was so ashamed of I didn't want to smile in pictures. I didn't even want to be in them. I always volunteered to be the one to take the picture. This is sad now because there are many group pictures that I have found where I remember the event, but I'm not in them. Yes, adults, especially my dad, told me that I was pretty. But, of course, my dad told me I was pretty. My dad's a great dad! But I didn't believe my dad or any other person because I felt like they had to, and at the time it felt easier to accept that I wasn't pretty. Not necessarily ugly, but there were features I definitely didn't want to have. Now don't think I was this depressed little girl. I loved my childhood. I found ways to be "Jolley" ;) But it's just when it came to myself and my looks, I didn't want to think about it. In 9th grade, a group of friends and I got ready for "the prom". We weren't 16 yet, so we took the day to get ready for the stake dance. Yep, poofy prom dresses and all ;) It was so much fun! We went to the dance, and some time during the night, this boy asked me to dance. Then he told me something which I will never forget, "You look pretty tonight." I could just feel the warmth go all through me, and for the first time that I can remember, I truly felt pretty. I believed I was pretty. This memory will stick with me probably forever. I even still remember the song we danced to! "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban. The boy that night truly did raise me up.  This is the power of a compliment especially from guys to a girl. This boy doesn't know what he did for me. He probably doesn't even remember it, but I do. He gave me a sincere, caring compliment which helped me change my attitude about how I viewed myself from that day on.

This doesn't just show the power of a compliment but the importance. Why else would God command us to love our neighbor? (Mark 12:31) We need to feel, see, and hear that love and support from each other. I am sure I am not the only one who has been changed from hearing truth and goodness from another. We ALL need it. It doesn't need to be as big of a compliment as asking someone on a date, but it could be just as simple as saying "I like your bracelet" or "You are so funny!" or "You make me happy when I see you". These are truths which could influence a life. The bracelet could be a hidden talent which inspires an entrepreneur. Confidence could be boosted to a shy, yet funny kid. Or someone who believes he or she has no friends sees that at least one person is happy when he or she is around. Yes, it might not be this dramatic, but isn't it worth the try? I double-dog dare you to try it. ;) Who knows? Maybe you'll become happier by complimenting someone else. I know I sure do. So thank you to my future date who asked me last night for that compliment of wanting to use your precious time with me. And thank you all for being in my life at least at some point. You have the power and the important blessing of helping someone become better than where he or she was. I am proof of that. Thank you. Volim vas.